Whether that tale is written about in silly fiction or spoken fervently in Relief Society or priesthood meetings, it is a false story.  It is false because it demeans the atoning sacrifice of the Lord Jesus Christ.  The tale acknowledges a mighty effort and sacrifice from him, but does not require a like labor of us.  But, do you believe he performed his atoning works so that we could be ‘funneled’, as it were, into the highest existence without faith on our part, without our own sacrifices, without our own showing forth of love?  If we will just take a bit of thought regarding the story, we will see its fundamental error and not be misled.

Now, as this fiction demeans the Savior, it also diminishes the significance of our covenants with Deity.  It is as if there were a kind of “trick,” so to speak, to our eternal happiness: You merely have to be married in the temple, to have the ordinance performed; after that you coast into a celestial state.  Or, in an alternate version, if you do not get a revelation at the time of the marriage ordinance, you are not bound by the covenant.

Incidentally, I understand that not everyone in this congregation may have been married in the temple.  But undoubtedly you desire greatly that blessing; thus, you’ll have it eventually.  So my message is for you, too.

What is the truth about this marriage ordinance, then?  The truth is that you and I covenant with the Lord as part of the ceremony and are thereby bound to think, say and do certain things and to avoid thinking, saying, and doing others.  The key point is that you and I covenant individually, with the Lord.  The officiator does not say, “Do the two of you agree to this?”  He says, “Brother Smith, do you…?”  Then he says, “Sister Jones, do you…?”  Thus it is that the Lord can say in the 42nd section of the Doctrine and Covenants: “Thou shalt love thy wife with all thy heart, and shalt cleave [that is ‘join yourself’] to her and none else.”[5]  This covenantal reality also gives power to the Lord’s teaching in Matthew, chap. 19, vs. 5-6: “For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh.  What therefore God hath joined together, let no man put asunder.”[6]  (The Greek means “divide” or “separate.”)  Have you thought of that?  We are commanded to love our spouse.  It isn’t a matter of guaranteed righteousness through the mere performance of the ordinance, nor is it a case of our loving him or her as long as it is convenient; nor is it dependent on our “feeling” about it—rather, our temple marriage is a matter of obedience to commandments.  You chose to be married in the temple; now you are obligated to the commandments that follow.

That is why the foolishness of the men and women of whom I spoke at the beginning is so dramatic, so potentially destructive!

That covenant is not dormant in the absence of a personal revelation that the ceremony is efficacious.  The covenant comes into force when the ordinance is performed acceptably before the Lord.  The only questions are:

1. Was the ordinance performed by one authorized to act in the name of Deity?
2. Did he perform it precisely as it is to be performed?

If the answer is yes to each of those questions, you are obligated to fulfill it.  Is it conceivable that for some Latter-day Saints that comes as pretty shocking news?

Now, before I remind you of what the Lord requires of you, given the reality of that covenant, I remind us all of the promise of it: By it we are enabled to come forth in the first resurrection to “inherit thrones, kingdoms, principalities and powers, dominions, all heights and depths;”[7] we inherit the blessings of Abraham, the ability to have progeny (not only in this life), the unlimited blessings of the priesthood (granted to both of you, of course, not just the man), and more.  Whereas baptism is the covenant of salvation, the new and everlasting covenant of marriage is the covenant of exaltation.  Think of it, brothers and sisters!

Well, those are the promised blessings.  Now, here is what honoring the covenant requires of us: “Cleaving” to your spouse means to hold him or her sacred—I’ll put it that strongly.  You can do nothing—no matter how trivial it may seem in the eyes of those who do not comprehend the greatness of the covenant—that causes your spouse to sorrow or mourn.  You cannot licitly even gaze longingly on another.  I don’t mean lustfully only.  I mean romantically, admiringly.  You cannot linger over a handshake with someone of the opposite sex.  You cannot fantasize about the possibility of a change in your circumstances—about how another would fulfill your needs more adequately.  You cannot seek for “missing” excitement in magazines or books or movies.  You cannot speak in a mocking or ridiculing manner to her or him.  And you certainly cannot walk around hand in hand with someone other than your spouse.