“Welcome to Heaven,” said St. Peter. “Before you get settled in though, it seems we have a problem. You see, strangely enough, we've never once had an executive of your level make it this far and we're not really sure what to do with you.”

There once was a rich man who was near death. He was very much aggrieved because he had worked very hard for his money, and he wanted to be able to take it with him to Heaven.

A man is praying to God, "Lord," he prays, "I would like to ask you a question."

Three friends are killed in a car accident and meet up at an orientation session in Heaven.

A little old Christian lady comes onto her front porch every morning and shouts, "Praise the Lord!"

And every morning the atheist next door yells back, "There is no God!"

A young bishop was an avid golfer. One Sunday, his meetings ended early and he decided to sneak out by himself for a quick nine holes.

A man wrote a letter to the IRS saying…

A man stumbles into a deep well and plummets a hundred feet before grasping a spindly root, stopping his fall.

An Irishman walks into a Dublin bar, orders three pints of Guiness, and drinks them down, taking a sip from one, then a sip from the next, until they're gone. He then orders three more.